So I've been trying hard to sign up for German classes. I tried a few weeks back and their classes were all either full (no room for moi) or empty (can't start without enough people). And so I fell beneath the crack and waited a while before I called again.
This time I had to come in to do some sort of test. I explained that I knew no German and just wanted to sign up for the beginner's class but they insisted that I come in for the test.
Their testing time was quite inconvenient but we managed to shuffle kids around like a good deck of cards.
Miraculously, somehow I arrived too early for the scheduled time but presented myself anyway. Incidentally, I was able to meet with the testing lady immediately because the previous appointment was a no-show.
I followed Testing Lady down the corridor as she chats away to me in German.
This is a test, I think to myself. Do not cave, don't give in. Just smile and nod.
We sit down at her desk and she introduces herself - I think - in German. She also gives me half her life story - I think. She may also have been commenting on my fabulous hair that day or my amazing shoes, but I can't be certain.
She holds out her hand to shake mine.
"And I'm Kylie."
"Oh...You don't speak German?"
"No." This is why I want to sign up for the beginner's class.
"None?"
"No."
"You didn't learn any at school?"
"No."
"Did you learn any language at school?" Her tone of voice may have reached incredulous at this point.
"No."
"Any extra-curricular language activities?"
"No."
I want to disappear under her disdainful, incredulous look. But I chose good looks over special powers when I was born.
She does her best to cough politely. "Oh....Ok."
It is at this point that I resolve to myself to do better in my next life. To take private language tuition as a four-year-old. Or at least to become good friends with Rosetta Stone.
"Well, then. You will need to join a beginner's class."
Dang. And I was so hoping to be put me in an advanced class.
I thanked her and left. Two minutes and this compulsory test was all over.
And with my spare time? The Opp Shop.
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The look she gave you was just to hide her embarrasment at the fact that she thought you were interested in her life story when you really had no idea what she was saying...
ReplyDeleteWhat? I can't believe you didn't learn any language at school or that you don't have any extra curricular language activities. Boy are you dumb...
ReplyDeleteso sorry about no extra curricular language activities.....didn't you tell her about the latin? Mum
ReplyDeleteHa ! The same thing happened to me. I went to Migros Schule to sign up, and had my interview as you did. Telling them that I have ZERO, none, nada, nul, zilch experience with German. My big mistake though was saying "I speak NO German" -- IN German!! Oops. Into a classroom for a 30 minute multiple choice test I went. Um, hellooooo I know nothing! So guess what, they put me in the beginner class too! :) Viel Gluck to us !
ReplyDeleteAwesome post! (The Swiss are weird).
ReplyDeleteI especially loved this part:
"I want to disappear under her disdainful, incredulous look. But I chose good looks over special powers when I was born.
She does her best to cough politely. "Oh....Ok."
It is at this point that I resolve to myself to do better in my next life. To take private language tuition as a four-year-old. Or at least to become good friends with Rosetta Stone."
Plus, I have a secret for you: the Swiss don't really speak German either.
Shhhh....