So I've been trying hard to sign up for German classes. I tried a few weeks back and their classes were all either full (no room for moi) or empty (can't start without enough people). And so I fell beneath the crack and waited a while before I called again.
This time I had to come in to do some sort of test. I explained that I knew no German and just wanted to sign up for the beginner's class but they insisted that I come in for the test.
Their testing time was quite inconvenient but we managed to shuffle kids around like a good deck of cards.
Miraculously, somehow I arrived too early for the scheduled time but presented myself anyway. Incidentally, I was able to meet with the testing lady immediately because the previous appointment was a no-show.
I followed Testing Lady down the corridor as she chats away to me in German.
This is a test, I think to myself. Do not cave, don't give in. Just smile and nod.
We sit down at her desk and she introduces herself - I think - in German. She also gives me half her life story - I think. She may also have been commenting on my fabulous hair that day or my amazing shoes, but I can't be certain.
She holds out her hand to shake mine.
"And I'm Kylie."
"Oh...You don't speak German?"
"No." This is why I want to sign up for the beginner's class.
"You didn't learn any at school?"
"Did you learn any language at school?" Her tone of voice may have reached incredulous at this point.
"Any extra-curricular language activities?"
I want to disappear under her disdainful, incredulous look. But I chose good looks over special powers when I was born.
She does her best to cough politely. "Oh....Ok."
It is at this point that I resolve to myself to do better in my next life. To take private language tuition as a four-year-old. Or at least to become good friends with Rosetta Stone.
"Well, then. You will need to join a beginner's class."
Dang. And I was so hoping to be put me in an advanced class.
I thanked her and left. Two minutes and this compulsory test was all over.
And with my spare time? The Opp Shop.