Ciao, Dignity.

A quick update on my quest for a white Christmas.
I left home 10 months ago today.
10 months later I'm about to have a very very white Christmas in the Swiss Alps.

Today I made a snowman for the first time.
Correction: I helped with 3 snowmen, 1 cat and 1 dog.
There were several casualties including a couple of ears and a head and I've just remembered that we didn't put scarves or hats on our snow people. I hope they survive the elements.

I thought perhaps if I moved around enough over the holiday period (a few days with my Swiss fam, a few days with NickNatTayaAbbyGeorgia, and a few days with friends) then I could accidentally miss having to ski. It would be a pity and all but at least I would escape with my dignity this season.
It was a good plan.
Not good enough.
Until there is a major blizzard tomorrow, I will ski. I somehow agreed. What was I thinking? I can see my dignity flash before my eyes.

Two weeks today til we fly out of Zurich to Miami.

2 days til Christmas.

12 hours til I lose any remaining scraps of dignity. MLF3 did tell me she might "sometimes wait for me on the pistes."

Merry Christmas all. I leave you with a photo of my fellow slope buddies. This one was taken in our village.


Anyone know a blizzard dance?

Kylie's Top10 Most Awesome Things from The Week That Was

So, in case you didn't know - being a part of a family who are packing up their house for a year to go traveling is hard work.
I'm not having the best week. Have worked a lot of extra hours this week, and I'm still hanging tightly to a head cold....plus Christmas songs have taken over the Radio. But, despite this atrocity (yes, yes I know, worse things have happened) I have a Top10 from the last week.

Kylie's Top10 Most Awesome Things from The Week That Was.

Shall we count down? - but in no particular order....

10.) Jill gave me an awesome present of Nutella, Carambars and A Physical Blog (also known as a blank notebook) for whilst I am away on the boat with no internet.

9.) I found 85 cents whilst cleaning the Laundry.

8.) I told the girls the story of the boy who licked a metal pole during winter. I explained a metal pole by pointing to the stand of MLF2's desk chair. MLF3 promptly went and licked it to "see what would happen."

7.) I got to finally see nicknattayaabbygeorge in their new home here in der Schweiz. It's amazingly beautiful. I get to live here for a little while when I come back from the States!




6.) I got a BIG (not gigantic or anything, but medium sized) box in the mail for Christmas. Tonight I opened it, just to see what was inside. I shook one of the boxes and I'm betting on a box of BBQ Shapes and I'm so excited. (Don't judge me - BBQ Shapes and I have been parted for a long time!)

5.) My sister Kaity had her 21st (Hip Hip Hooray!) and I called during her party and totally used and abused the situation by catching up with all her/my friends. 3 cheers for Skype. And for Kaity, since it was her birthday...

4.) The discovery of an AWESOME gift game. I love gifts and I love games so this was the best time ever. I've been meeting pretty regularly this year with an awesome group of people to discuss what it means to make Jesus a reality. And this week we had a Christmas party and I won a packet of popcorn.
I'd like to dedicate this packet of popcorn to my sister Kaity, because she loves popcorn the most in the whole world. And also because I stole many of her party guests away from her party to talk to me the other night.

3.) Cake. Birthday Cake. It was MLF1's birthday yesterday and this equals cake. Cake for days. Happy Birthday MLF1!! Thanks for choosing my Banana Cake as your PRIMARY birthday cake. I feel awesome and affirmed.

2.) Tomorrow morning all the kids from the Primary School start at 7AM and walk through the Village shaking and hitting and clanging the noisiest things they can find. What an awesome tradition for the last day of school for the year. I made MLF3 a bottle with rice in it. She thinks I am so clever. Such admiration in her eyes. I have reached the highest point of my Au Pair career. You think I'm joking. I'm not.

1.) And last, but not least: Singing Christmas Trees. They're pretty much awesome.

I AM 1 Brother and 4 Sisters

So tonight I had my first really long conversation in German.
All German.
And it was pretty long.

I think I pretty much stepped on all and any German grammer rules - not really applicable since there are too many anyway - but! I was understood - and! it.was.in.german.
I may have told her I am 1 brother and 4 sisters, but hey, nobody's perfect.

This is my 100th post. I'm pretty excited about this also. Because a couple of years ago I realized something about myself:
I don't like starting something that I may not be able to finish.

Now, I can't finish a blog, but I was terrified of starting it and then never writing in it. I wanted to write a blog, and to actually write in it. To have memories and thoughts and anecdotes written down.
And my goal in a year was 100 posts. I thought approximately 2 a week was achievable.

So, hip hip hooray! On my 100th post I had a full adult conversation in German.
I may have been 5 of those adults (1 brother and 4 sisters), but hey - at least we spoke in German.

Pregnant Much?

So, a couple of weeks ago, I got asked if I was pregnant.
I didn't think much of it.

Yesterday, when I was taking some medication, I was asked again. Are you very sure you're not pregnant?
I know, I know. They have to ask this. To be safe. So I didn't think too much of it.

But today. Today I was handed some clothing and asked, Do you want this? It might fit you. It's too big for me now, I wore it when I was pregnant.

!!!

Thanks, but no thanks!

Actually, I took it.
Who says no to Free Stuff?!

A Million Mandarins & A Suppository Deposit

Dear Blog.
I'm sorry I have not paid you any attention over the last few weeks. But you don't call or remind me that you exist. I forgot about you.
Here's an update...
I de-registered today. I have officially told this country that I plan to leave in less than a month!
This makes me sad. I don't want to leave.
Hooray for return tickets in March!

The lady at the Gemeinde Office (Community Centre? Where they keep track of all their obedient Swiss citizens?) seemed unsure about the whole process. My residency card stated a date that I was required to leave that did not match up with my VISA. When I questioned her about this, her only answer was, We can neither understand or fathom the ways and thoughts of the Foreign Police, or something to this effect.
Yeah right, just admit a typo!

I feel sad. I should be packing. Somehow I've accumulated far far far too much stuff. How did I come here with only 20kg?!
I technically leave Zurich in a week and a half - how did this happen?

I console myself with thoughts of sunshine and white beaches. Are the beaches white? No idea. I realized that many of the luxuries that I enjoy here: Internet, copious amounts of chocolate, TV, my own space, the ability to go for a walk whenever I want in my free time...
I will not have these on this sailing trip. No internet, no constant and available supply of chocolate, no TV, no space??! And definitely no random walks....unless I suddenly learn to walk on water...hmmm....

For 5+ weeks....eek.

However, instead I am swapping these for visits to Trinidad, St Lucia, Grenada, St Vincent & Martinique. (It's ok if you want to google these, I had to!)
So it's a swap I'm prepared to make. I think.
And....I get to visit my ever beautiful friend Katie and her lovely family in the States for a few weeks after the Caribbean trip and before returning to Switzerland! How wonderful is that!?

And in other news, my Swiss family is a bit sick at the moment and I seem to have fallen down as well. I don't know how, I am eating millions of mandarins! Isn't there Vitamin C in them?

This week I learnt about Suppositories. I think they are much more common over here than at home? I've certainly never had to deal with them at home?
I won't tell you the whole story, but let's just say that this week I've had to google Giving Suppositories to Children.
I never thought about this aspect when I decided to be an Au Pair (the things they don't tell you!)
I tried to convince her to take a normal pill. I assured her she was capable of swallowing it. That perhaps she could just try, and if she couldn't, that would be ok, but please please please could she just try.
She couldn't.
She wouldn't.
And so I learnt about Suppositories.
But I later found out she thought I was going to try and make her swallow a Suppository.
The language barrier.
Sometimes it's bigger than you think.

A Story About Vomit (Not for the Faint-Hearted)

I'm not a fan of telling stories that, um, reflect no-so-well on me. So, for that purpose, today I've got a story about Pippi.
Pippi Longstocking.

Pippi was so glad it was Friday night. It had been long week and she was looking forward to the weekend - she had plans to visit the tallest mountain in all of Europe.
But first - a costume party!

She was going to go as, uh, Pippi Longstocking, and despite feeling slightly unwell, dressed up as, ahem, herself. A friend of hers dropped by on her way to same party and also became Pippi Longstocking.
And off they went - catching the train to the city where they would dazzle everyone with their - ah, long stockings.

Until Kylie, I mean Pippi, continued to feel more and more unwell. Quite nauseous and capable of projectile vomit.
The pair of Pippi's arrived at their destination, and after taking a small walk in the hope of giving Pippi#1 some fresh air, decided that they really should head back home.

On a side note, you would be very surprised how many people will stare at you when you are dressed up as Pippi Longstocking. Pippi#1 was so glad that she had been unable to make bendy wire stick in the long plaits.
Oh so glad.

They sat down to wait for their train and spent their time discussing where it would be best, should be the need arise, to throw up. On the train tracks? Or in the rubbish bin? The Pippi's were divided on this issue.
Finally their train came and they boarded and sought seats near the toilet. Just in case. Although, by this time, you should know that it was highly likely.
There were none and so Pippi collapsed on the steps of the train.

*Side note: Ticket-checkers will NOT check your ticket if you look white or green. Or perhaps if you are dressed up as Pippi Longstockings with your head between your knees.

Pippi would like you to know that there is nothing quite so undignified as throwing up into the toilet of a moving train dressed up as Pippi Longstockings.
Nothing.
Or as the Ticket Inspectors asking if you were pregnant. Me? said Pippi. I'm just a kid!


Unfortunately Pippi was unable to visit the highest mountain in all of Europe that weekend but hopes to in the future. Instead, she spent her weekend studying the causes and statistics of why she is far more likely to get sick on the weekend when she doesn't have to work.
She promises to publish any future findings.

A Story About Chocolate

I was making MLF2's bed this week and I came across this:




Well, actually, it looked more like this:


They were somewhere in there with the sheets, very over-sized bear (which takes up more of the bed than she does!), pillows and the worn-out but much-loved duck. I think it's a duck.

How to discuss this? How can I, who can easily consume large quantities of chocolate in my bed during a book or movie, tell an 8-year old that she really shouldn't be eating small caramel lollies in bed after the brushing of teeth.

They may be small, but my friend Jill thinks they are better than Nutella! Sacrilege.

And so that night I broached the problem.
MLF2? (I don't really call her this, in real life I use her name) I think there's a little problem.

Yeah?

Well, I found Carambar wrappers in your bed. I think your bear has been doing something a bit naughty. I think Teddy has been eating them at night when you are asleep and I don't think they are good for him.

Her face was hilarious when I told her this. At first, she looked really worried, as though she knew she'd been caught out. Then, as I blamed the bear, she looked relieved. She even smiled.

Perhaps you could tell Teddy not to eat them in bed anymore. They are not good for your, I mean, his, teeth.

We reached an agreement. She'd let the, ahem, bear know, and Carambars would no longer be consumed in bed.

Now, where's my jar of Nutella?

Reflections During My 35th Week

I was driving home with the girls tonight from horse riding lessons. It was dark and and all the lights over the Lake were just beautiful. We had the music turned up, singing, and for once, I wasn't lost and I knew where I was going.
And I just felt overwhelmingly blessed.

I still wake up every morning and can't believe I'm living in Switzerland.
This thought comes after, Humph Grumph What's that incessant ringing Oh it's my alarm How do I shut that thing off Can I sleep a little bit longer.
But still. I'm pretty sure I'm in the top 100 Luckiest People in the World.

I've been going to School with the girls this week and sitting in on their classes. I like this because:

• I get to practice my German with the unsuspecting Kindergartners from MLF3's class. I got to have a whole conversation today with a little boy. Granted, it was about a toy helicopter - but still, I don't think he picked up on the fact that I speak English. A lot of the conversation was filled up on my behalf with words like Super and Megacool - but at least I sound hip.
• I got to actually understand the lessons in MLF2's class - they were English lessons, but whatever.
• I beat kids at a French counting game in MLF1's class. Yes, Mum, your efforts teaching me to count to 10 in French have finally paid off. Madame (What's her name - your French teacher??) would be so proud.

I've been especially aware this last week that I am here. It's not that I forget, but this week I've remembered. Some days it's hard and I feel tired and far away from home. And if I have to look at that Vacuum Cleaner again, I'm going to throw it from the top floor
(Of course, that would involve lugging it all the way up there, so I would think twice).
But all days I love being here and am overwhelmingly glad I came. My experience has far exceeded any expectations. I just love it.

Alas - time is slipping away. I keep thinking, It's only November, but tonight MLF1 came to me with some important calculations.
Only 48 days until we leave.
Huh? That's so....[gulp] soon.

Did I mention that I'm leaving a little early? Before a full 12 months? I'm leaving with my Swiss family on a sailing trip. On a boat. In the water. Somewhere a little south of the Caribbean.
Not sure how long. A month? Two? But then I am coming back to Switzerland. I hope. For 3 months. I plan to milk that Tourist Visa for all it's worth.

So these are few thoughts that are swimming around in my head. Along with questions of next year and what I should do with the rest of my life. But you know, no need to sweat the small stuff.
I got to fulfill a lifelong dream on Saturday. I licked Liechtenstein. Also discovered the ruins of a Wild Castle and very much enjoyed forests full of Autumn.
LG. Life's Good.

A Guided Tour Gone Wrong

Dear Tourist Guide Registration Office,

I would like your suitability checklist reviewed.
Or perhaps you just let one slip through the crack.

Recently, I was in Germany, in an unidentified city, which will remain nameless until I blog about in the future.
I went on a tour.
The tour was fine. The city is beautiful.

Unfortunately a droning irritating voice followed me throughout the whole tour.
Or perhaps I followed it. Yet to be confirmed as the tour guide.
I seemed to be attached to it by an invisible thread, also known as a tour.
Do not be alarmed, I was not alone. I was fully surrounded by others attached by an invisible thread, also known as a tour group. We held each other up for support.

I tried to follow along at the safest distance possible - ie 1 km, but then he would just shout at me to hurry. To be honest, I was embarrassed to be seen with him in broad daylight. Nighttime, perhaps. With the cover of darkness.

I knew things were a bit strange from the beginning, at the first attraction. Here, he spent no less than 5 minutes laughing at the people around us taking photos of the aforementioned attraction. Whilst instructing us, his obedient tour group, to NOT take photos. He loudly proclaimed that this was perhaps the most disappointing tourist attraction in Europe.
I liked it?

Now, I like jokes. I make too many of them. Funniness is funny. I like to laugh. BUT IF I'M NOT LAUGHING, STOP TELLING YOUR JOKES. Curiosity definitely killed the cat and your jokes killed your entire tour group.

The guide behind the droning voice with the unfunny jokes hissed at me. Seriously, it was a hiss. He also told the girl beside me that he didn't like her. Twice. Tour guides have to at least pretend they like the people in their group, don't they?

And he kept lamenting to us, NOT his friends or even sympathetic listeners, about his relationship issues. Over and over again. I think I unfortunately know more about his past love lives that I do of the city of M*****.

And he kept mentioning his tips. Every time I heard him mention his tips, I mentally deducted 1€ from my tip. 10€ - 100 x his unsubtle tip remarks = you do the maths. I'll keep the end result to myself, but let's just say he now owes me money.
I wanted to hand him a piece of paper, on which I'd written, Don't give up your day job, because that would be a tip he could use, but I think this is his day job!


The tour was fine. The city is beautiful. But there's a heartbroken, unfunny, hissing tour guide out there. And he owes me money.



Much love,
Kylie

Goodbye Autumn?

Autumn is fast giving way to Winter, so when I took a walk around our Village this afternoon I took my camera. It's so beautiful here at the moment, and, like I resented Autumn for taking over Summer, I'm also resenting Winter for stealing Autumn.

Perhaps too much resentment? If the seasons could just slow down a little bit, please. Thank you.








I'm off in the morning for Munich, or München, for the weekend. Hopefully there'll still be some leaves left on the trees there! I'll let you know...